Instant paella

Go to Valencia (Spain) and get yourself some saffron. It's much cheaper over there. Pack your saffron in your suitcase and go out for some paella at a non-touristy restaurant. It will be amazing. Return home to the US and have some paella at a local Spanish restaurant. It may be excellent, but it won't be nearly as good as what you had in Valencia. Buy a paella pan and the proper kind of rice and cook paella in your house using a recipe from a book about Spanish cooking. It may be excellent, but it will take a long time and won't be nearly as good as what you had in Valencia. That's why I came up with this recipe I call "instant paella." It's much easier to make than real paella and it's pretty good, as long as you accept the fact that it won't be nearly as good as what you had in Valencia, or as good as real paella. So here goes. (Purists should shut down their computers immediately.)

Put a couple of cups of rice in a good rice cooker. Instead of water, use chicken stock or shrimp stock, preferably low sodium. Then sprinkle in about half a teaspoon of saffron threads, stir it all around, and cook the rice. When it is done add a bunch of frozen, pre-cooked shrimp and peas and stir it around. Keep the rice cooker plugged in on "warm" until the shrimp heat through. Meanwhile, cook some sausages - lamb sausages are good, and chicken or turkey links work well, too. I'm not a big fan of sage-heavy sausages in this recipe. You could also saute some boneless, skinless chicken breasts in olive oil. Put the rice/shrimp mixure in a big bowl and stir in the sausage and chicken. If you really want to go crazy get a lobster steamed and cleaned at the market and throw in some lobster meat. Serve with warm bread. Think of all the money you saved by buying saffron in Spain.